At 26 years, Moses Mungutie is down to his fourth marriage. His 24-year-old wife Kwiocwinyu Clare has borne the brunt of his ugly side and come out with him a changed man. Moses’ previous wives ran away because he was a very violent drunkard who used to not only mistreat them but harm them as well.

Moses is a change agent and fisherman in Padoch Village, Padoch parish, Panyango Sub County. He attributes his violent behaviour to poor upbringing “I married young and I didn’t know anything about it. No one ever told me what to do.” This prompted him to be violent and neglect his wife and two children. 

“I used to do many bad things. I used to go to the disco 3-4 times a week and I had very many ladies. I didn’t care about my health and I wasn’t helping at home.” He adds. Moses who used to leave his wife with all the work is now involved at home. “I now work with her in the garden and at home. That is what a real man is supposed to do.”

Moses’ family attributes his woes to bad peer groups while in school. “He was very clever in class at Panyango SSS but groups led him to move to Packwach SSS. In S3 he ate (diverted) school fees and that was the end for him.” His brother Edmund recalls. Moses became a fisherman after dropping out of school “I made a lot of money and resorted to alcohol and women and I did nothing developmental.” Moses confesses.

The unbecoming behavior of Moses almost made Clare his fourth wife leave. This prompted the intervention of his family who involved Male champions and Pacego women’s initiative. These structures were key in mindset change for Moses “I was sensitized by the male champions. Pacego also trained me several times on issues of ending gender-based violence and how to be a better husband to my wife. It is through this teaching that I began to realize my mistakes. 

The good thing I knew what I had to do. I abandoned my old ways immediately because I was on the wrong path going nowhere but doom.” Moses reveals.

He began to make changes in his life. “I quit alcohol and the bad peer groups. I became a born-again Christian. The money I got from fishing, I began to bring it home and I began respecting my wife and I have never beaten or shouted at her.” He confirms. Some of the benefits he is enjoying are that he is developing better at home because he has a good relationship with his wife.

The Pacego gender training Moses had undergone encouraged couples to develop together and not rely on one source of income. Moses decided to take his wife Clare for tailoring training.

Moses and Wife

““After her training, I bought for her a sewing machine. She does tailoring work from home not because I wanted but because there is a need for her services in the village.  ”

Moses Mungutie

Moses values his wife and respects her. He hopes his story can inspire other youths like him to also change and be good to their wives. “If I had known what I know now, my life would be far better but it’s a lesson and I hope other people also change and be good to their wives.”

Moses appreciates the work Oxfam with funding from Irish Aid through UWONET and implemented by Pacego for the work they have done in his life. “I will forever appreciate the work they have done because they have restored so much of my life and my future is bright because I am focused on educating my children and taking good care of my wife.”